2:09 pm & 06.06.18

ohhhhhh, i want to fuck this guy, brandon. i do not want a relationship (he is just like every other guy i end up attracted to - always talking in this philosophical, bullshit way about things i don't care about that make him seem "smart"), but i want to fuck him badly.

after meeting up for a margarita last night, we sat in his car for three hours. we talked, and when he said things that normally make me cringe (about how i look or about kissing me, etc.), i did not hate it - in fact, i just believed that he was actually really attracted to me and that he was telling me the truth, and boy, did that make my experience better.

and it was slow and low-pressure. there was no expectation of being fucked that night (even if we wanted to), or even anything other than kissing.

so, we made out quite a lot, and i liked how he kissed me more aggressively (as i am wont to do). we talked about fucking each other, he explained how attracted he was to me (and how he'd had an erection the whole time), and so we decided to come back here and mess around for... another two hours.

we would've fucked, but neither of us had a condom.

things he did that i like very much: held my wrists down while he was on top of me, bit my neck hard, choked me, face fucked me with him on top of me, ate me out (rather well), bit my lip, told me, when i said that yes, he can face fuck me, and yes, i swallow, that "i was going to be a good girl for him, wasn't i?". he also put his finger in my mouth and said that i have a pretty mouth and that he couldn't wait to have his cock in it (swoon).

he also said many things in the car about how nice my skin tastes, and how he likes how i smell, and that my tits looked amazing, and i'm just here for it right now. he's also very perceptive in terms of what i'm responding well to and very naturally continues to do it, which is nice. not everyone is so attuned (or cares enough, to be honest). and he asked to do things, and was always saying things like "do what you're comfortable with" which was nice as well. i loved being roughly fucked, but being so clearly on the same page was fantastic.

it was so easy to be open about what we like and want to do.

he says that he "has no identity" and he will just blend into what other people want him to be and, if that's the case, honestly, i'm here for it. fuck me exactly how i wanted to be fucked. basically the only thing he seems to care about is having his neck kissed, which is akin to being blown for him in terms of how it feels.

he's very fit (was in the air force) and covered in tattoos and you can just feel how strong he is which... was so nice, actually. very nice. he has really nice arms. i don't care about his tattoos but damn, he has nice arms, the better to hold me down with...

i needed something like this to raise my confidence and boy, howdy, is that what it is doing. he is confident as fuck and very straightforward with how much he likes my body and i needed this. i needed this badly.

i really want him to fuck me hard.



my hands are so cold without you here.